Dispatches from the Abyss: Existentially Numb & Thoughts on War

Dispatches from the Abyss: Existentially Numb & Thoughts on War

I am sitting here trying to think about what to write as our delusional American fascist president Trump is threatening Iran with civilization collapse and extinction by the end of the day today. I feel at best comfortably numb. I’m Gen X. I’m 50 years old and I spent the first 16 years of my life under the daily threat of being nuked by Russia after a while, it’s just another day ending and Y. Nonetheless, what do I do today? What do I do? I’m working on things as I can. Its Tuesday and I am doing Tuesday things. I’m comfortably numb, if not existentially numb.

It's okay to have complicated feelings and thoughts over all this. I surely do as I have no love lost for the Islamic regime in Iran since they have supplied ruzzia with Shahed drones that have leveled mass death and destruction across Ukraine for the past four years. I want the people of Iran to be free, but not through the annihilation of their entire country. 

Most of the time these types of threats are just nuclear dick sizing by weak ass men and an epic game of nuclear chicken also by weak ass men. I pulled some tarot cards last night to see what today was and today is the Tower card day. That’s the card that flew out of my deck and I was like well... I don’t need to read beyond this -- now whether it’s a good tower or a bad tower or a same as it ever Tower remains to be seen.

This is the last moment we have in which we can course correct if Iran gets attacked as such - that’s it we’re done and there’s there’s nothing that is ever going to bring anything back from that. If America nukes Iran, Russia is going to nuke Ukraine, China is probably gonna go after Taiwan, North Korea will nuke South Korea, and anyone with an itchy trigger finger will use it as an excuse for total war because now it’s OK to do that. That’s the message that sent and that’s why this is so much of a bigger issue than Trump is insane and the government is beyond corrupt. 

We’ve seen the government upheaval of firing cabinet members one after the other is that they are probably preparing for the 25th amendment. This is the long knives where they’re now battling and fighting each other because they know they’re going to 25th amendment, and that means that Vance would be president. I don’t know who would be vice president but I have some speculations as to how that might play out. 

All I can do is sit here and feel is rage and sadness for so many reasons. If the nuke start flying I have no interest in surviving that because I won’t because I am disabled. I rely on a lot of medication’s and treatments and without those it would become 'not worth living' pretty fast. If I am angry THAT IS WHY. I feel like my life was offered as a sacrifice by dipshit MAGA losers and the anti-voting moronic farce left. At that point so if the nukes start flying - I am gonna peace and out. Obviously, I’m not going to do anything unless it necessitates it.

It’s a windy day today and the sky is blue with a little bit of clouds here and there. It’s probably a little cooler and it’s hard to think that wow tomorrow we could wake up to a country having been nuked beyond our capacity to even understand the ramifications of it. Trump doesn’t want to save the world he doesn’t even want to save ourselves. That is what this has been about for the past 10 years - destruction. We have destroyed ourselves. We’ve destroyed each other. He has destroyed families and friends. I can’t even tell you how many people I’ve lost from my life due to this motherfucker.

At best one can hope for the temporary reprieve of the 25th amendment and that the cabinet will try to save face as heroes that saved the world... until they fuck it up again five minutes later. 

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